Suns @ Bobcats - Robin Lopez lands on the IR with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome from excessive amounts Call of Duty: Black Ops.
Magic @ Pacers - Darren Collison drops 22 and 12 while the Magic still think they're getting Chris Paul.
Mavericks @ Hawks - Jamal Crawford shouts Jason Terry's daughter's name every time he shoots causing him to finish 1-11 from the field. Terry's daughter is named "Jasionna."
Heat @ Grizzlies - Rudy Gay plays like a poor-man's LeBron. Well, as poor as anyone can be on an $80 million contract.
Thunder @ Bucks - Brandon Jennings and Russell Westbrook have a race. A race into our hearts.
Cavaliers @ Spurs - DeJuan Blair and Samardo Samuels battle for position at Golden Corral.
Nets @ Nuggets - Jay-Z is a little upset that Carmelo hasn't read his book; plans to take out his frustrations on Jay Electronica's career.
Jazz @ Trail Blazers - The Luke Babbitt vs Gordon Hayward matchup prompts your dad to tell you about the "good ol' days" of pro basketball.
Knicks @ Clippers - Bill Simmons is at this game and mentions Andy Rautins and Ralph Macchio in the same tweet... and then again in an article... and then again in a podcast... and then again to anyone who'll listen.